Birthdays & Death Tolls
"Did I stutter?" he said to me, point blank.
I was two months in to the 2006 tour. Joe was on his leave, and already it was proving to be an exciting one for him. I, personally, had resigned myself to the fact that I was still a month and a half away from seeing my boyfriend, so my life consisted of me getting up at a ridiculous hour, busing to a job I hated, going home after and talking to Rob on the computer if I could. I was lucky, because he had a job that gave him more time online than most.
"Oh, you certainly didn't, but I am confused as to why I would want to go out to celebrate my boyfriend's birthday when he's not even here. I could be at home talking to him, instead," I answered, taking a sip of my coffee. He had met me downtown after work, at the coffee shop across from the bus stop that we usually met at with Rob.
"Okay, but we also need to celebrate my liberation from the tyranny and oppression of that vile woman." Joe and another of our friends had, during the day, met, moved all of his things out of his apartment, and in to storage. She cheated on him while he was gone, and that was that. No more chances, and Joe thought it would be funny to play sweet and in love, then while she was at work, move out - then ghost her. That was his sense of humour for you.
"But..." I started.
"No buts. We are going out to do the drinking that he can't do. Pat will meet us. It's our job as Rob's family."
That was that. The next thing I know I'm in a pub (I hate loud places) with an extensive scotch selection (I hate scotch), trying to talk to Rob on the phone in Afghanistan over the music while Joe made fun of him. After that my next memory is of the cab ride home, and us laughing all the way up the stairs to the apartment before we each passed out in our respective beds and I was getting texts the next day while I was working, reminding me to never listen to him when he thinks it's a good idea to drink that much - as if I could ever control him when he set his mind to something, right?
Joe wasn't the kind of person who liked to celebrate himself, at least not in my eyes. He did, however, like to celebrate others. When it came to celebrating Rob while he was gone, or making sure that I get out for my own birthday when my boyfriend wasn't home, he was the one there and ready to party. It was very rare that you could say he let you down in these circumstances.
We spent some quiet evenings together watching movies before he left again. I keep looking back on this time with him, looking for signs pointing to the beginning of change. Of course, he had only been in Afghanistan for a short period of time so far so he was still very much him. It's hard to recall thirteen years ago, when it's impossible to remember things from only seven months ago. As he prepared to head back, I made sure he knew that he was welcome at our place until he figured himself out when he came home.
As it would turn out, he went back to Afghanistan just in time.
Rob and I would generally chat first thing in the morning through MSN messenger on Saturday mornings. On April 22, 2006, I woke up to go greet him, but was instead greeted with a message from him. I don't remember the exact wording, but it was basically him saying that he can't talk this morning as one of his friends, Myles Mansell, was killed that day along with three others, bringing the death toll to sixteen from twelve. He just needed to be with Joe, but to not worry, he would be okay. I started to cry, of course worried about Rob regardless of his asking me to not do so, but also just so eternally grateful that he had his friends overseas with him so he didn't have to go through something like this all alone.
Joe always knew exactly how to take care of people, after all.
I was two months in to the 2006 tour. Joe was on his leave, and already it was proving to be an exciting one for him. I, personally, had resigned myself to the fact that I was still a month and a half away from seeing my boyfriend, so my life consisted of me getting up at a ridiculous hour, busing to a job I hated, going home after and talking to Rob on the computer if I could. I was lucky, because he had a job that gave him more time online than most.
"Oh, you certainly didn't, but I am confused as to why I would want to go out to celebrate my boyfriend's birthday when he's not even here. I could be at home talking to him, instead," I answered, taking a sip of my coffee. He had met me downtown after work, at the coffee shop across from the bus stop that we usually met at with Rob.
"Okay, but we also need to celebrate my liberation from the tyranny and oppression of that vile woman." Joe and another of our friends had, during the day, met, moved all of his things out of his apartment, and in to storage. She cheated on him while he was gone, and that was that. No more chances, and Joe thought it would be funny to play sweet and in love, then while she was at work, move out - then ghost her. That was his sense of humour for you.
"But..." I started.
"No buts. We are going out to do the drinking that he can't do. Pat will meet us. It's our job as Rob's family."
That was that. The next thing I know I'm in a pub (I hate loud places) with an extensive scotch selection (I hate scotch), trying to talk to Rob on the phone in Afghanistan over the music while Joe made fun of him. After that my next memory is of the cab ride home, and us laughing all the way up the stairs to the apartment before we each passed out in our respective beds and I was getting texts the next day while I was working, reminding me to never listen to him when he thinks it's a good idea to drink that much - as if I could ever control him when he set his mind to something, right?
Joe wasn't the kind of person who liked to celebrate himself, at least not in my eyes. He did, however, like to celebrate others. When it came to celebrating Rob while he was gone, or making sure that I get out for my own birthday when my boyfriend wasn't home, he was the one there and ready to party. It was very rare that you could say he let you down in these circumstances.
We spent some quiet evenings together watching movies before he left again. I keep looking back on this time with him, looking for signs pointing to the beginning of change. Of course, he had only been in Afghanistan for a short period of time so far so he was still very much him. It's hard to recall thirteen years ago, when it's impossible to remember things from only seven months ago. As he prepared to head back, I made sure he knew that he was welcome at our place until he figured himself out when he came home.
As it would turn out, he went back to Afghanistan just in time.
Rob and I would generally chat first thing in the morning through MSN messenger on Saturday mornings. On April 22, 2006, I woke up to go greet him, but was instead greeted with a message from him. I don't remember the exact wording, but it was basically him saying that he can't talk this morning as one of his friends, Myles Mansell, was killed that day along with three others, bringing the death toll to sixteen from twelve. He just needed to be with Joe, but to not worry, he would be okay. I started to cry, of course worried about Rob regardless of his asking me to not do so, but also just so eternally grateful that he had his friends overseas with him so he didn't have to go through something like this all alone.
Joe always knew exactly how to take care of people, after all.
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